Shoot, Shag or Marry: Possible Supreme Court Picks

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The one good thing about getting old is that you get raise a middle finger to the working world, grab a pina colada and retire. Within Obama’s first term the two oldest Supreme Court justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg, 75, and John Paul Stevens, 88, are expected to announce their retirements from the bench. They may be joined by David “I was appointed by a Republican but I turned out to be liberal” Souter, who has also hinted at resignation.

That leaves a huge hole where lefty outlooks on abortion rights, affirmative action and other progressive platforms should sit. In the event of a mass exeunt, who will Obama choose to sit court side? The field is wide open, but three names keep popping up in his search…

SHOOT: JENNIFER GRANHOLM

Granholm is the first female governor of Michigan, a post she reached after serving as the state’s attorney general. She graduated Phi Beta Kappa from Berkeley, got her JD from Harvard Law, got married (to a creepy-looking dude who is now officially known as “The First Gentleman of Michigan”) and raised three kids. She was even a contestant on The Dating Game! All of this is pretty impressive, but she has never served as a judge (strike one), was accused of cronyism during her gubernatorial bid (strike two) and is Canadian born (strike three). She is a Dem who supported Hillary during the primaries (oops!) but is now working on Obama’s transition team.

SHAG: CASS SUNSTEIN

An expert on constitutional law and an adviser to the Obama campaign, Sunstein worked with Obama at U of Chicago and now teaches at Harvard Law. He was just named head of the Office of Information and Regulatory Affairs in the Obama administration, but some speculate this is just a holding place until he can be named a SCOTUS justice.

Besides being uber-qualified, Sunstein also has some sexy law fire spewing from that bespectacled head of his, having called Scalia and Thomas “judicial fundamentalists.”  Let’s just say he and his Pulitzer-Prize-winning wife are both brassy, and we wouldn’t mind being the third in that trio. Also, the bald-with-glasses look really works for him.

MARRY: ELENA KAGAN

The former Dean of Harvard Law School, just stepped down to take the roll of solicitor general in the Obama administration. She matriculated at Princeton, got her JD magna cum laude at Harvard Law, and went on to clerk for Thurgood Marshall (the first African-American member of the Supreme Court). Her area of expertise is administrative law, including the role of the President in federal administrative and regulatory law. (Defining the scope of the presidency seems like an awesome idea after the last eight years.) She served as associate White House counsel to Bill Clinton (which, as we can all guess, sounds like a deeply, deeply challenging job), and has a kick-ass smile. Elena, you can be our justice any day!

*****

WORD UP: SCOTUS: Supreme Court of the United States, goddamit!

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