The 16th Minute: Repub Reject News from All Over


He’s ba-ack! Joe the Plumber—who is really Samuel J. Wurzelbacher, from Holland, Ohio, and was never officially registered as a plumber—is not only in the news, he’s reporting the news. What? Turns out Joe is so concerned about the state of the world that he’s throwing away those tools and picking up a pen (or laptop, or whatever) and heading to…Gaza? Yep, Joe’s got a new gig (maybe ‘cuz he could never pass that plumber’s exam), appearing on (that’s Pajamas TV, everyone) (no, really, that’s what it’s called) (I couldn’t make this up if I tried) as a war correspondent.

Joesorry, I mean Samtold his local Toledo NBC affiliate that his goal is to “let [Israeli] ‘Average Joes’ share their story.” You know those Israelis are snapping up their copies of his rushed-to-print memoir, thinking to themselves, wow, that bald-fake-plumber-right-winger-dude, he’s just like me.

Elsewhere in the Republican Reject Club, the still-unmarried Bristol Palin is…


stretching HER 15 minutes of fame by refusing to say whether or not she sold photos of her healthy baby boy Tripp. MSNBC reported on Dec. 30th that People bought them for $300,000, but there’s been no further news (yet).

I hope it’s true—someone needs to be the breadwinner in the Palin-Johnston household. Baby-daddy Levi recently quit not only his high school but also his oil-rigging job, cuz it turned out he needed a certification, for which he’d need to finish high school. Oh, and his mom pled not-guilty on Monday to charges of selling OxyContin and asked for a public defender. Awesome. Here’s hoping Bristol uses that money to a) get the hell out of Wasilla, b) go to college, and c) buy her way out of that shotgun marriage. Or, you know, start a web TV station—call it the Lingerie Lounge—I’m sure Joe would be happy to lend his expertise.

Repub Lineup of Rejects:

AP Piece on Joe’s new job
Levi doesn’t have a new job
Sherry Johnston lawyers up


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